By Jack Mauro
What are your plans for the holiday? None? Maybe taking in the fireworks – if the crowds and traffic aren't too bad – and that's it?
Not astonishing. As holiday weekends become more and more holiday weeks, what increasingly matters to most of us isn't what we do, but what we don't do. Namely, go to work. God bless Independence Day.
However – there are two kinds of days off. There's the single man's day off, which usually consists of sleeping in, flopping around in PJ bottoms, reading the 1992 GQ he found under the bed, scratching, and taking a long nap. Then there are partnered days off. These require just a little planning. Because nothing, including sex and eating, is more intimate than filling idle hours with no agenda or obligations, no matter how blessedly anticipated those hours are.
Here's what you do: make a plan with your partner, even if, if not especially, you want no plan to follow. If you've been seeing each other only for a few months and since after the last long weekend, this is a new stop on the relationship express. Let him know how these rare occasions of special freedom compel you to tackle nothing more daunting than, maybe, a line at the movies. The odds are he'll be like-minded – he's a guy too, after all. And what you're avoiding is that dreadful, mystifying clash of intent, when he's suddenly and irritatingly all bounce and eager for adventure, you're yawning and scratching, and both of you are wondering just whom, exactly, you're with.
The lesson is pretty damn simple and doesn't require fireworks. Don't take anything for granted. Not until you know each other's rhythms, habits, and ideas of what's fun or relaxing on time off. And Happy 4th, y'all.
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